Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Tasers and stun guns and muggers and drunk students,

oh my.

Which reminds me: few years back knew a lady who, due to a combination of stubborn/stupid/problems with authority, liked to go cruising through a couple of parts of town, late at night, where she had no business being. The cops quickly got to recognize her, of course, and she got pulled over several times, the conversation usually winding up as
"What are you doing here? You've got no business here, and you could get hurt."
"I can go anywhere I want to! Nyah!"
(I know; I told her myself; she didn't listen to me, either)

One night she came over to visit, and started the talking with "I hate that cop!"
Which one?
Seems the night before she'd been cruising, got pulled over, and somewhere in the "You could get hurt doing this" talk she said "I'm safe, I've got a stun gun!"
"Oh, those things don't work, let me show you." He took the stunner, stuck it on his hip, triggered it and stood there while it buzzed a couple of seconds, handed it back. "See? They don't work."
Now THAT made an impression. Why, here was the gadget she'd counted on if someone did attack her, and it didn't work!"
"So when I got home I was fooling with it, and I stuck it on my hip and pushed the button and I thought I'd died! I wound up on the floor, and it HURT! How'd he do that?"

I didn't help, sitting there laughing my ass off; I finally got out "D, he stuck it on his wallet. The shock can't get through all that."

The look on her face.

Finally, "Why did he do that?" Shock and amazement and some wonder in her voice.

"He was trying to get you to stop cruising late at night in a place where you could get your dumb ass raped and murdered, and he'd have to find the body."

No, it didn't help. She kept doing it until the night she had an accident(probably had added a beer or two to the attitude) and damn near died.

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