Friday, May 15, 2015

Glockheads are heathens, following a false prophet.

Real Americans worship at the Church of John Moses Browning.
What great miracle hath Glock wrought? Ugly plastic? Doing what H&K did years earlier?
Let me tell you about John Moses Browning (peace unto him), my son.
Browning bestowed upon us more types of guns than there are models of Glock (Amen!).
Browning created gas operation guns.
Browning put forth handguns, rifles, shotguns, and machine guns.
Browning gave us the .25 ACP, the .32 ACP, the .380 ACP, the most American of cartridges, the .45 ACP, and the mighty smiter of our enemies, the .50 BMG (Get that Fu#king fifty up!).
Glock perverted the greatness of Browning and shortened the holy .45 ACP into the .45 GAP. No man, especially no American man, deliberately makes anything shorter. It is a mockery.
Browning made unto us his rock upon this Earth, the 1911, still with followers more than a century later.
Follow not the unbelievers. Heed not the basement dwellers, mall ninjas, and armchair commandos. Do not anoint thy hip with kydex and polymer. There is room for all the apostles of John Moses Browning in your safe: Colt, Springfield Armory, Smith & Wesson, Remington, Ruger, Para Ordinance, Kimber, Wilson Combat, Les Baer, Ed Brown, and even once doubters like the former Teutonic heathen, Sig Sauer. Feel the gentle caress of the beaver-tail upon thine palm. Feel the weight of deeply blued steel in thine hand. Do no be tempted by high capacity, but let 8 rounds of .45 comfort thee. Wash away your tacticool sins and join us.

Stolen from J over here


Phelps said...

Brownings are elves.

Glocks are hobbits.

Armalites are dwarves.

Knitebane said...

Why settle for 8 rounds of .45ACP in your 1911 when you can have 14 rounds of .45ACP in your 1911?

taminator013 said...

Amen, brothers.................

KM said...

I do love me some Colt 1911s.

But when I carry, I trade that steel frame weight for ammo weight in a polymer framed, striker fired platform!

Jerry The Geek said...

Bless you brother KM, for you have sinned. You are forgiven. Now ... go thou and do right!