I found some of the Range Safety Officer memories

And here's some of them:
A shooting range is the perfect place to point a pistol at a boyfriend's face and make "pew, pew" noises - everyone will think you're really cute and laugh.

Texans are born with expert gun-handling in their DNA, so they "don't need no darned help", dummy - tsk

Spray-painted jeans, 4-inch heels and a top which reveals a tattoo reading "I do it for $$$" is totally appropriate fashion for a shooting lesson.

A double-tap from a 50-cal Desert Eagle which sends the second bullet through the ceiling is totally understandable if you simply tell the range officer "Dude, I'm the best in my clan online using a Deagle, so like, chill out, I know what I'm doing". Like, who wouldn't fail to admire a guy such as that?

3 people can totally fit into a 2-person space - as long as the person in the middle shoots at both targets so as to hit the walls on both sides of the range.

If the pistol won't fire, it's totally natural to turn it sideways and peer at the lettering on the slide - the guys yelling at you about "flagging" are just worry-warts who are too tense and shouldn't even be allowed near a shooting range.

It's perfectly all right to allow a child to carry your firearms and even shoot them while you run off to the bathroom - everyone else at the range will keep an eye on your child for you because they really have nothing better to do. Also, any person who points that it's a crime for you to allow your child to handle a firearm without you being present is obviously an idiot.

It's perfectly acceptable to offer your girlfriend's "favors" in exchange for more ammunition once you've shot your lone box of 25. Similarly, it's the done thing to offer this same honour when the owner of a range asks you to leave because you exited your vehicle with a beer in your hand - he'll definitely change his mind at that offer.

Safety rules are for old farts and sissies - nobody ever died at a shooting range.

It's ok to walk up to the firing line with a concealed and fully-loaded firearm - everyone will admire the fact that you can conceal a full-size cocked 'n' locked 1911 under your shirt when you casually whip it out and plunk it down on the table while they're downrange changing targets during a ceasefire. Range officers love surprises such as that and will want to learn more from you.

Wearing a tac-vest to the range means you're a real operator - everybody knows that. Bonus points if it's a real "Blackhawk!" vest, and double-bonus points if you also have a sheathed knife tied to your thigh.

The police officer's badge on your belt means that you can over-ride the range officers any time you want, because you're a trained professional. Threatening to arrest them when they won't bow to your authority will earn the respect of everyone present and ensure the immediate cooperation of the range officer (HA!).