Sunday, January 01, 2006

What's YOUR worst/best New Years?

Steve having made his contribution to the mental health of his readers this morning, it made me remember the one time I didn't wake up the proverbial bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.

A few years ago I was invited to a New Years party in Dallas. I took a bottle of whiskey as my contribution to things, and on the evening off we went(staying with friends, one of whom didn't drink, hell NO I wasn't driving). Party went very nicely until...

Most of the people there are Rennies(i.e., people who work at/live for Renaissance fairs), and were generally good people(Mouthfull, where are you now?). Great fun was had by all, the host took note of the fact that I spoke better English after some booze than I did sober, and somebody kept topping up my drink. With straight whiskey. Late in the evening, a while before midnight as I recall, I was sitting in a corner, halfway dozing; very drunk, and very aware that if I sat there a while and drank nothing more but water or tea I'd be fine. FINE, I tell you. And then a couple of people(man and woman, and later I could not remember who) started talking about the bit the woman was working on to gross out patrons(people who just come to the fair, wear regular clothes, i.e. normal people, though they wouldn't have put it that way).

I can't remember what the hell she came up with, I just remember that it was so bloody gross that after about ten minutes I arose fairly unsteadily from my nice, comfortable, warm corner and headed for the bathroom. Which luckily was empty. Where I proceeded to involuntarity purge my system of what seemed like everything except my lower intestines. Apparently noisily because when I left the host was at the door inquiring as to whether medical attention was needed.

I assured him no, just water. NOW, please. Which he did provide, and which I drank a damn lot of. By this time it was just about midnight, and I was in much better shape than I'd have expected, and the toast(beer passed around in a by God drinking horn) I did not have to bypass. Then I was (probably, this is a bit fuzzy) guided to the car and we went home.

The folks I stayed with had a big two-bedroom house, big bedrooms, but one was given over entirely to an office/workspace for jewelry work, so they had a cot in the attic for visitors. Not bad at all, actually; the heater was up there, it was warm and the cot was comfortable, it both gave me a place to stay and allowed people the chance to refer to me as the odd relative who lived in the attic. God knows how I made it up the ladder, but I did.

Came the morning, and probably because of all the water I'd had I did NOT have a hangover, but I didn't feel quite right, either. So I sat up and contemplated the universe until it occurred to me that food might be a good idea. So I dressed and went downladder, and happily it was only a short time after that my hosts came dragging out. I looked at them and suggested "Food?". They paused, hubby said that sounded like a good idea, so they dressed and off we went.

There's a chain in the Fort Worth area called Beefers, and they served breadfast until 2 p.m. on New Years, so there we went. No, it wasn't 1:30, only about 10:30. I got the BIG breakfast, as I recall a small chicken-fried steak, and hash browns, and two over easy, and a biscuit and gravy. And the Lord did smile upon me, for I took the first bite and a feeling of peace came over me, and all was right with the world. And I sat there and attacked my plate. About halfway through I looked across the table at wifey, who was leaning her head on one hand while she poked at her plate with the other; she turned barely-open eyes at me and asked, in a cracked voice, "How can you eat at a time like this?".

That was my worst awakening that had anything to do with booze, amazingly. Especially considering my mood for quite a while after my divorce. As of now, I've never woke up with a hangover. Never. A little fuzzy a couple of times, but nothing some liquid and food didn't take care of. I have aided some friends through the aftermath of one, and it's made me very happy to have avoided that particular experience.

And Steve? I had to work the day before AND New Years, so I had reason(besides not wanting to be on the road with a bunch of idiots and/or drunks) to wake up clear-eyed, as us virtuous folk do. So yell away.

(but if I'm nice, can I come to ManCamp someday? Please? I'll bring good scotch, I promise)

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