Thursday, March 28, 2013

Do not meddle in the affairs of buffalo,

for you are soft and can be turned into mulch.


I will quibble with this advice:
He added that he recommends staying further than 30 yards away to give yourself a chance to outrun them if necessary.
Dude, you can't outrun them; you can only find something to climb or hide behind, or hope they decide you're not worth the energy.

5 comments:

Windy Wilson said...

"A chance to outrun the buffalo."
About the same chance that buying a Lotto ticket gives you to become a millionaire.

Anonymous said...

Like a human beating a horse in a very short sprint you might not be able to outrun a charging bull but you *can* outmaneuver them.

God help you if you let them get in close though.

Titan Mk6B said...

Buffalo are mean and very unpredictable. If you can see them and you are not in a car or safe place you are too close.

Firehand said...

I'd hate to have to try to outmaneuver one; those suckers can turn fast when they want to.

I've seen a number up close from a vehicle, and one at about forty yards when I was on foot. One of those seen from a car started huffing and I got the hell out of there. The one on foot... well, no huffing but he was watching, and I was making damn sure there was something large to climb close buy until we were out of sight.

Keith said...

It doesn't need a very big calf to be much heavier, stronger and faster than Mike Tyson ever was

add to that that any sort of bovine has a foot at each corner and a much lower centre of gravity than a human has

they can usually out pace and turn tighter and faster than a human - usually - there are a few conditions like soft ground or deep snow with a crust on the top where we might have an advantage, but even a calf can kick out with a hind leg at human head height, front, back or side - with more force than a taekwondo roundhouse.

I've been charged a few times by domestic cattle, non of them made contact.

There's a field in the village where I grew up where two people had been killed by bulls, a neighbour's father was killed by a bull, another neighbour died about 15 years ago from head injuries after being knocked down by a cow, my own father received multiple fractures, including ribs skull and vertebrae from a "tame" calf and an uncle received several broken ribs from a bull which wasn't even attacking him, it just stepped sideways crushing him into a gate.

fortunately most animals only want to be left alone, or to get you to leave them alone, they don't want to expend too much energy following you when you are retreating - there are occasional exceptions to that, and they're even more unpleasant than a charge that ends when you run away.

In close, if you cannot run and have sufficeint guts to do it, a high speed charge will take the critter well past you if you leave side stepping or a dive and roll late enough, but few can remain calm enough in the face of something adrenalin and testosterone fuelled and seven times the weight and strength of a young Tyson charging them, and few people can role and be on their feet again as ably as this guy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usHVNtWdfL0&feature=share&list=UUhXeY7fbjJOokoXUay22wtQ