even more so than I'd known:
Now imagine you have Â£20'000 in the bank just collecting dust with
it's piddly little 1.5% interest rate, crying out for some real
investement. Well in 2000 Piers Morgan found himself in this very
position! Unfortunately for him he's Piers Morgan, and thus he is shit
at almost everything, including crime. He got caught playing the stock
market and suddenly found himself the subject of an investigation.
Fortunately for him he's Piers Morgan, and thus is an expert at weasling
his way out of nearly any situation. (Notice I said nearly.) He was
found to be in breach of financial journalism's sacred code of conduct
but for reasons unknown he managed to keep his job. The fact he blamed
the two columnists that wrote for his financial section may have helped.
They lost their jobs. Oh and during their trial, it turned out
Piers hadn't invested Â£20'000 in Viglin all along! He'd actualy
invested Â£67'000 under his wifes name.
So a few years passed, Piers made more monumental fuck-ups along the way and pretty much drove the Daily Mirror
into the ground. By 2004, it was the last straw. Silly ol' Piers went
and authorised the publication of photos fresh from the war in Iraq,
which seemed to show British Troops abusing and mistreating Iraqi POWs.
Unfortunately for him he's Piers Morgan, and the photos turned out to be
fake and he wasn't going to be able to get around this one. He was
fired the paper had to actually run stories on their front pages for
about a week offering their most sincere apologies and making lame
excuses. It was pretty pathetic.
Clarkson was furious, as any of us would have been. Fortunately for
him he's Jeremy Clarkson and happened to be attending the British Press
Awards, along with that cheeky scamp Piers Morgan! So what did he do?
Did he confront the invasive little shit and give him a piece of his
mind? Not quite. Rather than talk it out Clarkson slowly walked over to
Piers and cracked him straight in the face, then he calmly left.
Okay so it's not quite 'raped to death by grizzly bears on PCP' as
Piers Morgan actually deserves, but you take the small victories where